Have you ever started the day off with such positivity that your smiles seems to brighten everyone else's but by the end of the day you feel so low so down your tears just come crashing down for no reason? and all you can do is sit there and cry. and just think what the hell is wrong with yourself.
Today, for me, is one of those days.
I started off the morning with cookies. I was baking cookies. Choc chip cookies. I was just extremely bored and exceedingly happy. After three batches, my mom whisked me and my sister off to get some chores. We picked up Alvin just for fun. I adore his dog. It's extremely cute and it is extremely friendly~ doesn't even bark at you.
Continued my baking session in the afternoon, by this time, i started to feel slightly down but i just kept going. I just wanted to shake it off. I tried my best but by evening I just felt immensely down.
Call it hormones or puberty. whatever you want. I just don't feel good today. right now.
I just feel sad. I watched How I Met Your Mother and 90210 and Vamp Diaries. By then, i would be giddy with joy. But for some reason, the more i watch, the more the tears come pouring down my face. All i feel like doing is crying. i just dont feel happy.
To make things worse. Everyone else in the house is happy. positively happy. i just keep smiling and giggling. and the longer it goes on, the more the guilt and pain piles on.
I want to be happy. I want to laugh along sincerely.
I just. I dont know anymore.
can you make me laugh?
joyce
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